Anyway, I am obsessed with Maya Angelou.... I just want to give her a hug.
"Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean."
For realz moving on Thursday and Friday!
Can't wait!
I love my space, I think that the way you 'live' (excuse me while I become a wanker for a few seconds) is a huge reflection on the way you live your life & who you are as a person... if that makes sense? You know, that whole, a messy house means a messy body and mind, that bullshit? Yeah, well, that.
I like that I have 'stuff'. Not junky random bits of crap, jammed into display cabinets (well, some random bits of crap...) but mostly well thought out, carefully placed pieces of art or antiquities (mostly fake.).
I have decided not to take all of my stuff into the new place.. there is just not enough room. I had enough stuff for an entire house.. I was dreaming when I thought I could fit it allllll into a one bedroom apartment! Having said that, i'm not really "getting rid of it", I am just keeping it in storage..... hahahahhahahaaaaaaaaa.... oh i'm lame.
I am so happy with the person I am right now. I don't know who the fuck that girl was last year... I hope she never comes back. I don't think she will.
I let people walk right over me... trample me into the ground. Not going to happen again. Rose of three years ago wouldnt have stood for that! I'm clearly the same person, so why was I letting it happen? It's bullshit. I had convinced myself that that was who I was. I couldnt say anything, I couldnt stand up for myself, I couldnt ask why things that I didnt agree with were happening, I couldnt say no, I couldnt make eye contact... hell, I couldnt even scream at the top of my lungs when I was angry!
Thats not me!
I'm not letting it happen again.
I've had two major break downs in my not even 24 years on this earth. Thats it. No more thanks. Two is more than enough.
Maybe if I could have just an ounce of the confidence this lady did, that would be fantastic....
I remember when this photo was taken, it was 6:30am and I hadn't gotten out of bed before 12pm for the better part of a year, I was drinking a mega sweet coffee with soy, it was one of the best coffees I have ever had. No make-up, no bra and I didnt even care.... I was 19 - make up and bras were pretty important to me then, hell, they are both still in my top 5.
It really was a cheesy, this is the first day of the rest of yr life moments..... something clicked then and something is clicking now.
I owe nothing to nobody.
I have a boyfriend who loves me unconditionally. He has seen me at my absolute worst and he still tells me everyday that I am the most beautiful girl in the world. Up until Ben, no boy that I was ever in love with called me beautiful.... one boy when asked if he thought I was beautiful responded with.... "Awww, she's pretty cute... I don't know about beautiful...." we had been dating for about 6months when he said it...
YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! I KNOW YOU READ THIS BLOG, you big jerkface! Humph! Lolz.
But as I was saying or rather rambling, my family, my friends, my cat, my boyfriend & myself.... thats all I need and they are the only people I should have to answer to.
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